About a month ago at a minor league baseball game my son Aiden spontaneously became part of the stadium entertainment. He, my wife and I had seats along the first base line, right behind the home team dugout. During a break in the action, a promotion took place where a representative from the ball club got on the roof of the dugout and announced it was time for the YMCA.
He was of course speaking of the smash hit 1978 disco song by The Village People that has long been a fixture in North American sports venues. Standing next to the man on the microphone was a special needs adult male who bristled with nervous energy knowing his particular entertainment portion of the ball game was about to begin.
As the familiar pounding beat of the song began, this fellow sprang into action clapping his hands and shuffling back and forth to the music with reckless abandon. Aiden leaned forward in his seat and sat transfixed by this large enthusiastic man. After one chorus of the song where the dugout roof dancer led the crowd through the overhead arm gestures that form the letters Y-M-C-A, Aiden was done watching. He shot up to the dugout roof and began to groove prompting a cheer from some of the fans sitting in our section.
Without a hint of fear my son danced throughout the rest of the song and enthusiastically formed the letters in the chorus a few times. On the autism spectrum, Aiden has physical development delays that make his dancing immature and somewhat disjointed but neither he or the baseball spectators seemed to mind.
When the music was over, applause was doled out to both my son and the special needs gentleman who got the whole party started. It was a fine moment for Aiden and he grinned accordingly as he returned to his seat. Upon reflection though I wonder if there is a time coming soon when my son's spontaneous dancing will become an occasional source of ridicule and not appreciation.
At 13-years-old Aiden is presently growing like a weed. He is already nearly as tall as my wife and it won't be long until he sports facial hair and more than the occasional skin blemish. When it's a young man recklessly dancing at a sporting event and not a boy, it likely won't be as endearing to some. Most adults likely won't have a problem with it but some of my son's teen peers might.
Aiden has already been teased about his dancing once. As long time season ticket holders, he and I have attended many Calgary Hitmen junior hockey games. A big draw for my son at these games is a promotional dance contest where fans vote with their applause for their favourite dancers as they are shown on the centre ice scoreboard video screens. Aiden has been thrilled to win prizes in this event four times. However on one occasion a couple of years ago, once the contest was over he was goaded by three boys in their early teens into another impromptu dance contest.
One of these kids was urging Aiden to show his best moves, then when it was his turn he'd do a wildly exaggerated version of what my son had just done. The teen's two buddies howled with delight at this scene. When I recognized what was going on I didn't freak out. I calmly walked over and got the mocking trio's attention by asking, "Really guys? This is what we're doing?"
The teens quickly exited the area but exchanged some big laughs with each other as they got farther away from my son and I. Aiden was fine after the incident but was surprised to learn that the other boys were making fun of him. Many autism spectrum kids don't have the awareness and ability to read social cues to allow them to realize when one someone is having fun at their expense.
As I think things out here, I realize that the answer to my "should my son dance or not" dilemma is likely arming Aiden as best I can against the haters of the world. I don't want to tell him he has to pack up his dancing shoes. I think he just needs to know as he gets older some young people may find it odd or funny that he still wants to get up and dance in public places. I have to make him aware he may get teased for his efforts but if he wants to take that risk it's fine with me.
I have always admired my son's fearlessness when it comes to performing, whether it's on a school stage or the roof of a baseball dugout and it's not a quality I plan to squeeze out of him anytime soon. You go boy!
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