On stage "Weird Al", clad in a Jedi robe, was flanked by more than a half dozen swaying stormtroopers and a single Darth Vader with his bright red lightsaber lifted above his head. My 13-year-old-son Aiden and I joined the rest of the enthusiastic Calgary, Alberta arena crowd in singing and swaying along with Al.
Actively participating in this nerdist love-in, I was having a blast. I felt such a connection to my kid and was so glad I brought him to a show that turned out to be far more entertaining than either of us had anticipated. All praise "Weird Al", the fifty something song parody legend that transformed Michael Jackson's "Beat It" into the food obsessed hit "Eat it."
"Weird Al" fandom is the newest of many boxes my son and I have been able to check off as shared interstests. I'm a lucky guy. My son and I both enjoy watching superhero movies, getting on the floor and playing with our two dogs. amusement park rides and cracking up to classic episodes of "The Simpsons" On DVD. He also has those special things he shares with his mom, like cutting a rug together as they play a "Just Dance" video game.
But there are those areas where he and I don't connect. Even though Aiden happily attends Calgary Hitmen junior hockey games with me I know it's the food, the mascot and in game promotions that are the true attractions for him. When I try to get him interested in watching sports on TV it's almost always a non starter.
I've learned not to sweat this. I am grateful to connect with Aiden as often as I can realizing the cards I have been dealt as a father are easily played. Even though my son is on the autism spectrum, diagnosed a decade ago with Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS), he is high functioning. His attention deficits don't prevent him from embracing a variety of real life adventures. But there a lot of kids on the spectrum who fixate on a just few things in their lives and are closed off to other experiences..
This is hard on any parent who wants to share their life with their child but I find it's particularly tough on driven accomplished dads. Picture a dad who has always been able to take charge of things coming to terms with having a son who is not going to follow in his footsteps, a son who not only can't play competitive sports but is unable to attend large sporting events because the noise of the stadium and the rush of the crowd is too much for him.
Please dads don't step away. Whether you have an autism spectrum son or daughter don't give up on being bonded to your child. It seems like there is always a way to connect. You may just have to come way past the middle and over to your child's areas of interests even if they don't make sense to you. Whether it's viewing cat videos on the Internet or collecting and arranging tiny figurines, if you invest yourself in something with the child you love, you 're going to get enjoyment out of it.
Before my son introduced them to me, I didn't know there were hordes of video game review and parody videos on YouTube I have been surprised to find more than few of the people making these videos are very imaginative and funny. Video game obsessed adults can be entertaining and "Weird Al" has serious chops as a live performer; it's just some of the things you learn in finding that stuff that's pulls father and child together.
"Weird Al" Yankovic
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